End of Ze World.

All we need to know we learned from YouTube.

Have a laugh, it's the beginning of the week.
Have a laugh, put it on repeat.
Sometimes Mondays we feel like a bitch.
Sometimes Mondays we are like the western witch.
But ya gotta suck it up and get over the hump.
Eat your turkey sandwich and stop being a grump.

*f & j

Crank It.

Don't you love stuff that just makes ya laugh instantly?

Not for a solid reason, just 'cuz?

For us, it can be a photo.

Or, a ridiculous song.

Crank it bitch.

Plugged the Hay In

photo love, via swissmiss

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We heart books and movies like they're our real live friends and sisters. Well, that's because they are. No, reeeally! We hear 'em chitter to each other all the night through, sitting and pondering the wonders of life in the crevices of our bookshelves, and now, temporarily, in boxes and suitcases, stashed away for another brighter tomorrow in a new land called Buxtown.

A Tenenbaum might query, 'But what is life to me/Life has forgotten me,' while moodily smoking a ciggie in a tent on the floor, and a Didion might holla back, 'My husband died at 5:51a.m. and let me tell you why life matters and what love means,' while sitting at the Reg Bev Wil waiting for her daughter to get better so they can go chillax with Alice and friends in creepcityville Wonderland.

And so goes a night at Jude's while all the zombies and otters are sleeping soundly. The books and movies, side by side in perfect harmony.

But alas, sometimes it's hard to find the time to give books their due time when movies are like inviting cherry pies of SparkNotes for the words of pretend lives. We're so plugged in allll the time that we can only get to so many books but anything electronic and shortened serves us much better in the day-to-day, we're very saddened to say. We might have taken the time and turned off the cellie long enough to read 100 Years of Solitude but we haven't cracked Love in the Time of Cholera (even though word on the side street is that it's way the hay betta than 100 Years), and that's the one with a movie comin' out, but ya know what GI's? We'll probably just watch the movie and get to the book when we have the good ol' time to really sit down and eat it alive.

And it turns out, the divine miss Nora knows exactly how we roll. Ms. Ephron penned a nice little ditty for last week's New Yorker, and oh, my, my, if it isn't a delightfully right-on cream pie in the sky...

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"When they got home that night, she went to get the book. She’d ordered it earlier in the week and meant to read it before they went to the movie, but it was a hard week and things got away from her. This was happening more and more.
"Maybe we’ll find out what happened at the motel, he said. Why did it skip forward like that?
"He said it’s the same in the book.
"Who said?
"I told you who. The guy I was standing with while I was waiting for you to come out of the men’s room. The guy outside the men’s room said there’s a scene in the book that’s not in the movie. He said Javier goes to see a total stranger in some office, who’s never been mentioned earlier.

"Why did they leave that out?
"How do I know? Write a letter to the Coen brothers.
"She opened the book and started reading from the end."

*

We're pretty sure we've had this same conversation about a dozen and a half other times after seeing certain movies. Well, except for different names were sometimes substituted if Benicio couldn't swing a role in said film. But you get the idea. We get the idea. Nora certainly has the idea down pat. So let's go read a book, dearies. We'll know a whole heck of a lot better what the hay we're talking about. At least on Thursdays.

*

*j

One more reason.

photo love

to love Andy Samberg. Oh, Martha.

*f

Laughing Till Your Blue

Oh, oh! Try not to smile. Just try, pumpkin pies.

*j

Hello! My Name is Myself.

photo love

So.

A few days ago, our dear friend Michigan Marky sent out an email to our shared study abroad friend group. This boy is majorly smart. Works marjorly hard. And is majorly fun. Majorly. Totally. For sure. Rad. Okay that's good.

So, recently, Mark decided to take it down on a notch on the whole drinking thing. Like, a motorcycle to a ten-speed. A H3 to a skateboard. He's like going green about drinking, kinda. BUT. The way he made this announcement was just sortta fucking hilarious. We just had to share it:

So, about two weeks ago I decided it was time to setup a meeting with myself to go over a few "personal issues". I logged onto my Outlook Calendar which basically runs and controls my life from about 7am to 9pm Monday - Saturday... and thankfully found a 15 minute gap on a Tuesday, October 30th, so I added myself to the meeting and set it to private. Come Tuesday at 1:15pm, 5 minutes before the meeting I found myself sweating bullets and bout ready to drop a load in my pants. Why you ask? Why am shitting my pants over a meeting with myself? Well, I knew the dreadful day of reckoning was bout to hit and so-called responsible Mark was bout to take over. 1:20pm hit, so i grabbed myself by the collar and dragged my sweaty, turtlehead ass to the 1st floor Starbucks, sat myself down, looked myself in the eyes and almost slapped myself. "Mark", I said..."Its time to realize soemthing...you drink yourself to stupidity each and every weekend, wake up in the morning hung-over, puking, and clueless what you did the night before or for that matter who you did (jk)." I shrugged my shoulders, put my head down and nodded. I said, "Its time to call it quits".

*Plus, (True or False) does your planner rule your life like it does Mark's and ours? When did we become responsible adults? We still crave Pixie Stix and middle recess. Ugh. But we commend and give much respek to Marky. What a brave soul to face his own self in a meeting, especially when he really had to take a poo (from the sound of it).

-f

Top That

This makes us cringe, pee our pants, and poop ourselves simultaneously. Teen Witch hilariouty.

*f

Frolick with the Polycorns

video love dedicated to our boy, millipede

Personally, we were moved by the 'Wisdom from the Grave' portion of Diary #3. The 'Don't Kill Yourself' or DKYS tip from the Socrates machine sortta reminds us of some friends of ours (Trashbag & Kathy Lee Giff, if you were a curious cat).

These friends frequently send us rando text messages saying 'Kill Yourself' (KYS) and 'Eat Shit!' (ES) or 'Eat Shit And Die!' (ESAD). Now that may sound dark and twisty and may even scare you that our friends are such deranged devilish creatures. But we think it's kinda dark-twisty-hilarious when we get these messages. Plus, what our creature friends don't know but that we know is that it's Opposite Day and we are On Base, for infinity. Plus we are rubber and they are glue, so everything sticks to them. On top of that, sticks and stones man. Sticks and stones! So it is us that really gets the last laugh. Wahahahaha. ES!

*f

I'll be 30 next month, and I plan on living forever.

Do you fancy yourself open-minded and maybe a little fuckin' weird? Do you think trolls, wizards, and ghosts are kinda hilarious- in most contexts? Have you ever tried to read The Bible or eat a salad and found that both were kinda sucky?

Well you should meet Baby Cakes, the giant man-child created by the darkly sparkly mind of South Park writer and cartoonist, Brad Neely. Episodes are posted on superdeluxe.com and Neely posts new shorts every 6-10 days on the site. And uh, bring a change of clothes. Because you might just poop your pants laughing.

*f

Iran so far away.

No homosexuals in Iran, eh Ahmadinejad? Hmmm, yeah we don't think so. Pure genius Samberg, as ush.

*f